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Thursday, July 15th, 2010

Time:11:13 pm.
How do you tell somebody you miss them...?  What's the best way to say good bye...?
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Thursday, July 8th, 2010

Subject:Just skip this...
Time:11:30 am.
For some reason I feel like venting a little.  Typing for strangers seems inappropriate, but it isn't an issue really.
I'm still caught up in a similar problem as before.  I would like to be friends with my ex.  My fault in the relationship ending, as I understand, was my failure to diagnose my anxiety and depression.  I let all the negativity in my life ruin what was most important to me.  I wore her down to the point where she couldn't go on anymore with me.  In the months after the break up I have grown immensely.  I have made new friends, found some new interests, and generally moved in a healthy direction.  I have tried communicating with her, not judging her, being a friend, even stepping back entirely and leaving her to herself.  We always end up getting back in touch with one another, on both sides.  She still isn't comfortable around me.  We aren't together, and hardly communicate.
I don't understand grudges.  I have never been the kind of person to never forgive.  She has said some horrible things to me; I shouldn't even consider her a friend after much of it.  At the time I felt I deserved it; looking back, I realize how desperately in need of her love I was.  I have explicitly told her I would like to be forgiven, even though I don't know if I should be faulted for my depression by somebody else.  She has refused to admit that I didn't understand myself.  I still long for the warmth I felt from her, but if she isn't meant to be the woman to supply it then I accept that.
I know she wasn't whole as a person, and neither was I.  I neglected many aspects of my life while I was with her, as did she.  We didn't enrich our personal development much, things for me were particularly stagnant.  She was scared to admit to me how much she wanted to break out of it all.  I was blind to the problems.  I wanted things to be mostly about us, for us to be all we ever needed.  I set myself up to want that, I was wrong to ever think that.  I knew it wasn't healthy at the time, but like all addictions I kept doing it.
Nobody is infallible.  I certainly loved her as much as I could fathom loving anybody.  She was number one in my life, and I still couldn't be who I should have been.  I wish I had the courage to change sooner.  
Looking on this entry now I realize how disjointed everything is in my mind, even still.  I should be able to put stuff together better after all this time.  I will never understand love...I will never understand betrayal. 
I still have so far to go.
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Friday, January 15th, 2010

Subject:Last Song
Time:11:26 pm.
Mood: drained.
I didn't even bother to check this time.  How long has it been since my last post?  Will anybody read this one?  I think this will probably be my last one.
Let's just say I have been obsessing over a loss.  For six years I was working on a relationship with my girlfriend.  I loved her more than I imagined I could love anybody.  She brought emotions and feelings into my life.  I didn't even get the chance to really show her everything I am capable of.  If's been three months since the break-up, and I am still grieving.  It's like a death of a close friend for me, but I still see her ghost every so often.  I really don't feel like I know her anymore.  She has changed.  I thought I knew her, I thought I could do better for myself and help us both be happy.  She didn't communicate with me openly.  In the last three months I have found out more than I felt I knew in six years.  I always tried to learn her feelings, but she always told me she wasn't a talker.  She's a new person now.  I don't remember her as she was before, it's slipped away.  The person she has become must be a doppleganger.  I was loved before, then suddenly I was loathed.
I have been trying to communicate, be a friend, get to the bottom of things.  There is no bottom.  To her, I'm wrong.  Imagine:  You:  "What am I worst at?  The person you love:  "Relationships."  You:  "What am I best at?"  Tpyl:  "Being yourself."  And it was said with a laugh.  Can you imagine six years in a relationship and the only good things you supposedly did were buy the other person some lunches and a Nintendo DS?  Really, that's all I did evidently.  Then I tried to point out that I helped fix her truck, her car, etc...and she has the audacity to offer money to pay me back for my kindness!  How insulting!  Because now she has come into money she wants to just throw some at me to make my kindness just go away!  There are countless times I offered care, support, kindness, empathy...and I'll be remembered for food and a video game system.  What a schmuck I am, right?  That's the tip of the iceberg, the vitriol that has been heaped on me in the last three months is practically unbearable.
I had never felt so loved in my life, at least I don't remember feeling more loved.  To have all that suddenly disappear; it seems so long ago, yet it's just three months.  I have also never trusted so much.  Every aspect of my character was exposed, and I thought I could be understood.  I felt that I wasn't being judged.  I was so comfortable, and open in the relationship.  I wasn't comfortable with myself, and only now do I have a small handle on what the problem more than likely is.
Friends should be open and honest, correct?  And then friends shouldn't judge, right?  Well, when friends tell you 50% of a story willfully, and then take offense when you ask about the other 50%...call you nosy, that you're keeping tabs, that you're placing them under a microscope...why should they have ever told you anything to begin with?  Why should I ever even ask about their life?  Why expose myself to all the bitter, suspicious remarks?  Why bother to go on in the relationship?
I have been far from perfect.  What I have been though, I thought was admirable and worthy of love and consideration.  I am just exhausted.  I'm tired of having my feelings shredded.  I can't change anybody else's feelings.  She is so bitter and resentful, yet she keeps me around.  Surely she knows the pain I'm feeling.  I tell her.  She has to understand, right?  Then why force me to just be a pauper in a relationship where we used to be king and queen?  What other choice do I have?  Friends, or do I just disappear? 
I don't even know what "friends" means to her.  From my observation, "friends" to her are impersonal relationships where the other person takes zero interest in her life and just blathers on about there own life without caring about her.  Carrying out a conversation where there isn't a juvenile joke every two minutes is wrong, because life can't ever be serious...you've got to just forget about anything serious and focus on being a fool.  Finally, nobody is allowed to have a bad time.  If you're having a bad time, then she's having a bad time, and she'll blame you for that and not consider what's wrong with you...that's your problem, not her's.
Sadly, love has become a sad feeling for me.  The person I have loved does not love me.  She is uncomfortable because I still love her, I'm uncomfortable because she doesn't love me.  Worse yet, there are the flickers in her behavior that I interpret as potential cues that she might still have feelings for me...
What a long, and pointless entry.  I only did it to free my mind a little.  It's cheaper than therapy.
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Wednesday, February 28th, 2007

Subject:Yearly update
Time:6:25 am.
Mood: thirsty.
Meh.  I can hardly believe it myself.  But it's been a year or so since I last updated, and my insomnia has kicked in, so what the hell.
Let me think about what I can say...still working at the accounting office, still with Michelle, still driving the same car, still still still.
Nothing has changed on my end of things.  Kinda sucks, I should really do something about it.  You ever get that feeling you just need to do something more with your life; like you're really just not happy with things?  Well that's me.   I need to find my place in life, still.
But why write a miserable entry after a year.  My birthday was a couple days ago.  Too old.  25?  Shit.
Once I got old enough, I stopped really making "lists" for Christmas and my birthday.  And at that point I started getting shitty presents.  I'm still willing to say that my birthday is "just another day" and that there really isn't any reason for it to be any different than any other day.  Isn't it fun when people buy you a book or something and then go, "When you're done with that, I'd like to read it" and you just want to go, "Well, this may come as a surprise, but I'm already done with it".  Most of the time I'd be annoyed with people who whined about this crap, but for some reason this birthday has hit me differently.  It could be that everything else seems to be going poorly, I don't know.
Or maybe I do know...crap, why am I updating again?  I've got a headache, I need to finish sleeping for a couple hours so I won't be exhausted today.  Take care.
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Tuesday, February 28th, 2006

Time:1:20 am.
Alrighty, it's been awhile. But I'll go ahead and update now because my weekend was fun.
On Saturday night Mikey and I went out to Jungle Island. What? Yeah, it's some place out on Madeira beach. We got there around 11 for the show they were having. Mikey's brother, Kevin, and his rap group, Downsquad, were performing on stage for the cd release party they were having. $2 kamikazes, purple hooters, and drafts. Damn fun time really, great drinks. Kevin and his boys threw it down for about five songs or so, then mingled with the crowd. I bought their new cd, but didn't have enough for a t-shirt. Hell, maybe I'll hit Kevin up for a shirt later. Afterward Mikey and I went by Wafflehouse, where they neglected to even bring me my order. Mikey got his, and I waited til the end to say anything. Amazingly, the check was picked up by the house...and then I went to Steak n Shake where I got a chicken finger dinner. So it's my birthday at this point, Sunday. I had plans to go to Edo with my parents, and my aunt and uncle.
I woke up around noon, got cleaned up, and putzed around the house for a few hours. We went out to Edo around 6, met up with my aunt and uncle, and got ourselves a big tea pot of sake. Sake is great, lots of fun can be had with sake. After one tea pot was down, we got another. The chef cooked an excellent meal, and I got a cake and photograph of myself to commemorate the occasion. Then we came back to my house. I called Michelle to see how her bowling tourament went. It went alright, but her team only got like fourth. Ah well, can't win 'em all. She wished me a happy birthday and said her mother would be coming by with my birthday present, since her mother was in Orlando earlier for the tourament.
So like a half hour later her mother shows up with a couple balloons and a gift bag. How thoughtful of Michelle ;) Then Jean goes out to the car to get something else she forgot. I went to the kitchen to get something, and when I get out of the kitchen here's Michelle out in the dining room waiting for me. Huge surprise there, given that I wasn't expecting her at all on account of her having a tournament that weekend. I really haven't been that pleasantly surprised ever, I don't think.
So it was a good weekend. And Laurie, we'll have to figure out a day for us to go out and grab a drink or whatever. I should be free sometime this week so we'll coordinate a time. I know, you're thinking "Gee Tobes, you tell me when you're available..." Alrighty.
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Thursday, November 24th, 2005

Time:6:01 pm.
Mood: hungry.
Today's Thanksgiving. Michelle is in St. Louis for a bowling tournament. Fortunately that afforded me the luxury of spending time with my parents since that's the idea of holidays, spending time with your family. So we went to Salt Rock Grill for a Thanksgiving lunch. Well, I got the best fish I'd ever eaten there. I guess that's what you get when you go to a good place. My parents both got turkey, how traditional. I couldn't pass up Mahi Mahi Lousianne. We got a ritzy bottle of wine, enjoyed ourselves, and now I'm back at home. I haven't had a holiday with just my family in...two years.
Other news...meh, it's not worth typing. School is busy busy busy, my uncle died of cancer this week, the memorial service is next week, and I really don't see how I'm going to be able to fit all the stuff I need to fit into my schedule now.
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Thursday, November 17th, 2005

Subject:This is worth updating about...
Time:10:14 pm.
Mood: tired.
This will be long, but coming from me this should be interesting/entertaining.
I finished my midterm exam in my Wednesday class, met with my group afterward, and then met up with Mikey who is in my class. He had been partying in Tampa with a bunch of Irish guys in town to see U2 and these Trinidad soccer fans. Mikey was like 15 minutes late to the exam...fortunately somebody called him to give him the heads up about the exam. Anyway, we went to the Tavern, on campus, because I wanted to get something to eat and listen to the live music. Mikey wanted to go back to Tampa...to hell with that. So I got a Guinness, a Bud, then I was actually hungry enough to get a sandwich and a pitcher of Newcastle to split with Mikey. We talked with various people, this girl we know showed up an she was having relationship troubles, she ended up leaving shortly before the place closed around midnight. This intriguing girl was playing a fiddle and singing, I had never seen her at the Tavern before. One of those "I wonder what she's like" people. So after the place closes, Mikey and I were by the fiddler girl and her friends, and they're suddenly asking us if we want to go out for drinks...her, her female friend, and this gay guy. Sure, drinks, why not...
So Mikey's car was right by the Tavern, mine was like a half mile away closer to the building where the exam was. So I get in Mikey's car and we tool over to this girl's apartment. Nice place, like two blocks from Baywalk. Built in like 1920...twelve foot ceilings, wood floors from the 20's, oh the stories that place could tell. So we all shoot the shit there for a little bit, and it turns out fiddler girl works the Renaissance Festival and loves the Rat Catcher. Go figure, because I pretty well have that man's show memorized. After awhile we hobbled over to The Garden, which is this pleasant bar with an outdoor sitting area. Mikey was pretty well ready to leave, but we ended up staying around for awhile, talking. Evidently I look like this drummer they all know, to them I look exactly like him. I'd wondered who was masquerading as me, because I get that "do I know you" crap a couple times a year. After the bar kicked everybody out we ended up going back to that girl's apartment. Go figure, fiddler girl goes to sleep, the gay guy, who was nice to talk to, leaves, and so does this other guy who was with us. Then, it's Mikey, this girl, and me alone for like three hours. Shit, I should have driven myself. Not a bad time, but I didn't get out of there until 5 am or so. I was bloody stranded by Mikey's flirting and drunkardness.
Ah well, interesting time. Nice to meet new people.
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Saturday, November 5th, 2005

Time:1:41 am.
Mood: hungry.
Now I don't want to jinx myself, but I have to wonder when my truck is going to break down. It's bound to sometime or another. I finally fixed the leaky radiator, properly. I haven't noticed it leaking since. But then the check engine light comes on. It always comes on. I think I need to replace some emissions related component, you know what that means? It means until that light stays on for a very long time I'm not going to take it in anywhere. Of course, I could just spend about 100 bucks on a code reader and find out what the computer is complaining about myself.
At any rate, I'm driving up to Orlando today. Rich and I should hopefully be able to do a bike ride, and then some other stuff I guess. Then on Sunday we'll be going to the auto show in motion thing that GM does to make their cars look good. I would just as soon crash a car by myself rather than have some GM representative sitting next to me when I do it.
Then I guess I'll be driving home sometime before my class Monday afternoon. We'll see. I have a research design project that I need to see about setting up with some fire ants. It'd be more fun if I didn't think that half the class was going to get a free ride and I'm going to be earning my grade the hard way along with the other three dedicated people. Oh well, I'm bound to get something out of it for all my hard work. But not a blow job so it's not worth it.

Kidding! Really!
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Tuesday, November 1st, 2005

Time:1:20 am.
Mood: hungry.
Yesterday was Halloween. I remember being young and loving to get dressed up moderately to go get candy. Nowadays, I sit around the house and hand stuff out. Before the day even came this year I envisioned myself getting dressed up for some event. It'd be nice to get dressed up again. I was thinking "vampire" and then realized I'm not pretty enough. So what's a non-pretty vampire? DEATH! I like Death, and I think given the proper attire and make up I could do it well. I've got the skull shaped face going on.
The kids this year were nice for the most part. I'm glad parents are still teaching their children manners, because I greatly respect kids when they say thank you. Had I known I'd have so much extra candy left over I would have given the thankful ones extra. Cute costumes this year, nice kids playing the parts of their costumes sometimes. And me wishing I was young again to go get candy. Not bad though, just wish I could still get five pounds of candy I'd never eat, again.
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Thursday, October 20th, 2005

Time:2:26 pm.
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Tuesday, October 11th, 2005

Time:11:01 pm.
Mood: hungry.
Greetings. Yesterday was interesting, let me tell you all about it.
It's funny to see the neighbors stupid jack russel terriers...especially when the three of them are chasing a German Shepherd down the street. That's the short version of that story...hilarious.
My mother had some 24 hour bug yesterday, so I went to Biff Burger to get dinner. I was rather surprised when I walked in the place and it smelled exactly like my grandmother's house. Quite nostalgic, I was rather sad that I'd never see/smell any part of that place ever again. The girl behind the counter at Biff Burger saw my hat, and said "Go Cowboys"...I grinned really big at her. See, the Indianapolis Colts have a horseshoe logo...the Cowboys have a star logo...but both teams have blue in their color scheme. Even I used to confuse the Colts and Cowboys when I was little. But really, almost every stranger asks me "Are you from Indianapolis?" or they have no idea what the hat is for at all. It amazes me, it draws a hell of a lot of attention. "You're a Dungy fan aren't you?" Sure, and a Manning, James, Pollard, Stokley, and Wayne fan as well. I wont bother mentioning the whole roster...
I bought a Nintendo DS, which I needed to play the Castlevania game I bought last week. Great game, I haven't been disappointed with it yet.
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Sunday, October 9th, 2005

Time:6:47 pm.
Mood: bored.
So, what's been going on. I'd do the daily rundown if stuff happened daily, but it doesn't. Anyway, I did a group debate last week in class. It wasn't the clusterfuck I expected it to be, which was nice. Things seem to work out most of the time. I have a midterm exam tomorrow that I might not study at all for, since the final exam can count for them both anyway. I just don't feel the motivation. I'll probably do well on it anyway, who knows.
I picked up Michelle's new sunglasses today...she lost her old ones. Not a whole lot is going right for her in Orlando, but she's managing. No sense in going into the specifics, it's just the usual shit that people have to deal with.
College ball this weekend sucked: all the teams in Florida won, and every out of state team that I would have liked to have won lost. Oh well, Florida will be losing a bunch of games before long. Bucs lost today, that's too bad. But it's because Cadillac wasn't playing, he's the new backbone of the team. Colts pretty well have another victory in the bag, that'll put them at 5-0 for the season. Edgerrin James is tearing it up.
This coming week shouldn't be anything special. I really should look into getting out of the house. I feel like going out for a drink or something, not a bunch of drinks though...I'm still refraining from the alcoholism demons.
Yesterday was my mother's birthday. Went out to Edo Japanese Steakhouse. It's like Arigato, but different in several better ways. If Arigato would remodel their entire restaraunt, they'd have an elbow up on Edo, but Arighetto must not see the point in redecorating after 30 years. So tonight my parents and I are going out to eat again, a Greek place on the beach, Grecko Grill. One of their clients, it's a good place on Madeira Beach. You all should check it out.
I need to start pumping iron again, I look insanely frail...could be worse I guess.
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Tuesday, September 27th, 2005

Subject:Great Article
Time:3:01 am.
Mood: happy.
Approximately zero of you will have interest in this:

I had pretty well lost faith in the Vols by halfway through the second quarter. That was premature. Just like the Colts ripping into the Bucs a couple of years ago, Tennessee mounted a great comeback against a heavilly favored LSU and did one of those rare "come from way behind wins". The article is pretty good. Enjoy.
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Wednesday, September 14th, 2005

Time:3:38 pm.
Mood: bored.
Alright. Update. I went on the Share the Road bikeride with Rich this past Sunday. That was fun. Some guy evidently thought we were really serious cyclists or something...I guess it looked like we were doing 40 mph to him. Yeah, I guess Rich and I looked that cool in our outfits. The ride was fun, although we got off course at some point and were almost planning on just biking home from downtown until we had second thoughts about that. Went to see Transporter 2 after that with Rich, Ryan, and Emily. Corny movie at times. Jason Statham was good, but whoever decided to cut the budget on the movie so that the special effects during some scenes looked C grade, well, he should probably be fired. But the movie is a funny release from semi-believable action movies. This movie had some many "no way is that ever possible in a million years" moments. Afterward we had dinner at Arigato, and at this point my body was really just looking to relax and recover from the beating I'd given it on the bike ride.
Um, other notes. Today my radiator started leaking. Only Rich will understand this part. When they replaced a side of my radiator, they used the automatic transmission version, with the hook up points for the transmission cooler. Guess where it's leaking out of, yeah, where the automatic transmission that I don't have would hook up. Worthless repair men.
I applied for graduation the other day...I'm not feeling the whole "I'm done with college now it's time to live my life" thing. I don't even have a clue where I'll be a year from now, hopefully somewhere peaceful.
I suppose I should have more to update about, but I don't. Ta ta.
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Friday, September 9th, 2005

Time:10:08 pm.
Mood: hungry.
Well, what's going on...My uncle doesn't think his house flooded, or sustained any damage really. His boats are still on the side of his house and none of the trees in his area look to have fallen down.
Other news, my final semester, perhaps, at USF has begun. Off to the usual start, with some twists. I'm socializing more with everybody...and I even attended a Student Business Organization meeting yesterday. I might try to keep up on that, build some networks.
My most interesting class is my Statistical Analysis of Animal habits class. For the first two weeks I was to chart ant tunnels as they dug through sand in little clear medicine bottles. Well, I started out with two ants. Then the smaller one died. Then I got another. Then it died. Then I got a third, and tonight. Drumroll...it died. But I think the project is going rather well. I've been in touch with the Professor and she seems to like having my input on things.
Well, other news. Sunday I should be biking through downtown St. Pete with Rich and his brother in law. That should be fun, since it's police escorted. I'll be sure to mention something about that, remind me if I forget.
And...finally, I guess. I'm on the fifth Harry Potter book. I read the sixth one first, so this is the last one for me. Good books, I'm sorry I was so close-minded about them until they...ooh, almost ruined the sixth book for you! Well, anyway, what kept me close-minded about them was the fact that everybody owned a copy, and nobody seemed to read them. This screamed "stupid fad" to me and I didn't want to be a part of it.
Take care online world, maybe I'll see you in the real world.
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Monday, August 29th, 2005

Time:1:41 am.
Mood: hungry.
I had a good weekend. I went up Orlando on Friday to visit with Michelle, and stayed until Sunday evening. Well, I still don't really like Orlando. And I think I'm through eating pulled pork for awhile, the last two times from two different restaraunts has torn me up. But really, I had a good time in Orlando. We hung out with Rich Friday and Saturday evening, that was good fun. Fun fun fun. The only thing that could be more fun would be if Michelle hadn't left to go to college there; though it makes me appreciate her and my feelings for her more.
Ah, other news. My Uncle and Aunt live in New Orleans. They were talking about coming down here, then decided not to...then thought about staying around 5 pm yesterday, and around 7 pm yesterday they decided to leave. Crazy hurricane is going to destroy everything. Quite amazing really, the power of that mother...nature. Well, the interstates heading east were closed, so my aunt and uncle packed up some stuff, and five of their seven cats and took off for Memphis, Tennessee. Two cats ran off, and well, they must like rain because they'll be getting a lot of that along with 160 mph winds. 190 mph gusts. I can't imagine driving my house down the highway at 160 mph and having the windows and roof staying on...I think this might be the most destructive storm to hit the U.S., and it doesn't help that my Uncle is at about 11 feet above sea level and the storm surge is supposed to be around 25 feet in some places.
I really wish the best of luck, and my prayers go out to those who are going to be dealing with the storm. It's going to affect everybody.
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Monday, August 22nd, 2005

Time:6:33 pm.
Mood: bored.
Last night was Laurie's birthday dinner. I guess that's what it was given that her birthday was today. We went to Bahama Breeze, and it was my best trip there thus far. They didn't have the Trinidid Chicken so I got the Jamaican Grilled Chicken Breasts, which were excellent. Everything about the meal was great. I can understand why Laurie and Brienne keep me around, because every so often I make an idiot of myself and then they get a laugh out of me. I don't mind, I rather enjoy making other people laugh.
Well, as always conversation was fun and enlightening. After dinner I play a game of Monopoly with Laurie, and managed to lose. I made a deal for Mediterranean Avenue, and gave her Illinois Avenue for it I think. Well, she managed to get money and build hotels on the properties anyway. I was aghast. But it was a good time, and I'm sure it was a good start for Laurie's birthday to win Monopoly.
Comments: Read 4 orAdd Your Own.

Thursday, August 11th, 2005

Time:11:15 pm.
Mood: hungry.
Ah well. Today was enjoyable. Gotta love buying tickets from ticketmaster.com and then signing up for the trial membership with entertainment.com. I'd never been to Edo Japanese Steakhouse, always an Arigato man myself. So I printed off a buy one get one free coupon, and a Cold Stone Creamery coupon. Well, I was amazed with how open and clean the place was. Arigato is really a slum compared to it. Michelle and I got seated by ourselves, felt too cold at the end of the table we were at, so we moved to the other end. Then some guests showed up to the table, nice people. Greg and Elizabeth. They were expecting their baby in October. Greg was nice enough to order some tuna sushi, and shared it with Michelle and me. Well, if that's as good as sushi gets then I'm going to go ahead and stick with eating steak and rice, thanks. I went ahead and got a large decanter of sake. My meal was good, and close to the end the chef saw that I'd finished my bottle. "More sake?!" I pondered...sure! I needed to feel in high spirits since all of the steam and grease from the grill was blowing in my face. No, really. All of it. We were obviously seated at the other end of the table because it was the better seat for the the "first come" people. Well, come the end of the meal Greg and Elizabeth paid their bill and left. Even with the dinner coupon and all the bill was still quite a bit on account of my sake fettish.
So we ended up going to Cold Stone for some ice cream afterward. It was nice. Came home, and I was so drowsy I kinda nodded off. That's a good way to end an evening without disagreement.
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Tuesday, August 9th, 2005

Subject:Chicken and more, fish and more
Time:8:36 pm.
Mood: hungry.
The last couple days have been enjoyable. Rich's graduation was Saturday. I went up there Friday with Michelle, because I didn't want to drive up at 5 am for the 8 am graduation. We all went out to dinner, and tried to get to sleep around midnight or so...as it would turn out, we were waking up at like 5:30. Michelle and I never really got to sleep, and upon her alarm going off she had just fallen asleep. After getting cleaned up we went to the basketball stadium for the graduation. Some jack off wanted to make himself feel special by telling me I couldn't reserve seats. I told him I got there early, asked where he was that kept him from being there before me, and told him I had no reason to move. He said he was going to get an usher. Mikey was there, and he told the guy to bring him back a box of tissues on the way back. About five minutes later the usher actually comes over, "I'm sorry, but you can't reserve seats (he seemed a little uncomfortable looking at me for some reason) I can give you three minutes for the rest of your party to show up". Well, three minutes passed, and lo and behold, they wanted their five seats. So I scooted over two seats, thus rendering any chance of them sitting together impossible. Sure, they got their seats, but I didn't let them sit together. Bwa ha ha.
I was dog tired, however tired dogs are. By the time we got back to Rich's apartment I was ready to go to sleep. But there was lunch at Margaritaville to be had. I elected to drive Michelle and myself there, thus getting us like 15 miles closer to home. Lunch was nice, I got to talk with Ryan a little bit. But before the food made it out, I was dozing off. Zzzz. I perked up enough to slowly eat my chicken caesar salad and then say my goodbyes.
The drive back was arduous. I was falling asleep, and it was like 4 pm. Michelle was already asleep...so I just turned on the radio and made feeble attempts to memorize/repeat lyrics to the the songs.
Long story short, I didn't crash, made it home, and fell asleep shortly thereafter for 3 hours, woke up and ate dinner, then went back to sleep.
I bought the Discovery Channel cycling outfit today. The original style grew on me, and perhaps I'll look in to getting another outfit somewhere down the line.
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Sunday, July 31st, 2005

Time:5:21 pm.
Mood: hungry.
I have been meaning to update for awhile, I suppose. Here goes: Lance Armstrong won his seventh Tour de France. Go Lance, I'm glad he was able to win his last effort and retire on a high note. I like how he's taking the initiative to be responsible for his children, so I fully support his decision to retire to spend more time with them.
On a sad note, my favorite sandwich place shut down last week. Louie K's in Tyrone Square closed its doors on Saturday, July 23rd. I learned that they were closing on the previous Friday, because thankfully I went to the mall that day. I'd been eating there for about four years, and pretty much loved everything I ever got. It was by far my favorite place to eat in the mall, and I'm really sorry to see it go. Turns out the mall was raising their rent, and the new terms of the lease were going to prevent them from remodeling the way they would have liked to. Seriously, I was just about in tears about the place closing. Best rueben sandwiches anywhere.
Other news...hmm...I just got back in from a bike ride. The heat outside is murder. I don't know how the pro cyclists put up with it for like 4 hours a day, at 30 mph. I literally almost killed myself a couple days back riding hard, I think I was about ready to just die from over exertion, but it felt strangely good.
Alright, I think that's about it, I'll update down the road.

Happy (belated) Birthday, Ryan.
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